Are you wondering how to be less tired?
“I don’t know if you’ve ever felt like that. That you wanted to sleep for a thousand years. Or just not exist. Or just not be aware that you do exist. Or something like that. I think wanting that is very morbid, but I want it when I get like this. That’s why I’m trying not to think. I just want it all to stop spinning.” ― Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower
I am no stranger to fatigue. I have been tired for longer than I can remember being not tired. The sad reality is, sometimes sleep just doesn’t cut it. Sometimes the fatigue is so oppressive, you just wish you didn’t exist at all.
I’ve spent the past three years looking for solutions for fatigue, since the birth of my youngest daughter. I am getting there. It’s getting better. But I have had to take a hard, long look at the things I was doing. Was I resting in the right type of way? Keep reading to see I discovered.
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Also, I am not a doctor or mental health professional. Just someone who has lived with anxiety for many years who is passionate about sharing her experiences and tips for success. If you are in crisis call your doctor, then click here for some good mental health resources.
Sacred Rest
My sister noticed that I had not been myself for a while. I was so bogged down by exhaustion that I was not functioning well. She introduced me to a book last year that I really got a lot out of. It’s called Sacred Rest by Sandra Dalton-Smith.
“How can you keep your energy, happiness, creativity, and relationships fresh and thriving in the midst of never-ending family demands, career pressures, and the stress of everyday life? In SACRED REST, Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith, a board-certified internal medicine doctor, reveals why rest can no longer remain optional.
Dr. Dalton-Smith shares seven types of rest she has found lacking in the lives of those she encounters in her clinical practice and research-physical, mental, spiritual, emotional, sensory, social, creative-and why a deficiency in any one of these types of rest can have unfavorable effects on your health, happiness, relationships, creativity, and productivity. SACRED REST combines the science of rest, the spirituality of rest, the gifts of rest, and the resulting fruit of rest. It shows rest as something sacred, valuable, and worthy of our respect.
By combining scientific research with personal stories, spiritual insight, and practical next steps, SACRED REST gives the weary permission to embrace rest, set boundaries, and seek sanctuary without any guilt, shame, or fear.” (Amazon description for Sacred Rest)
The 7 types of rest
Like I said above, sometimes you just feel like sleep isn’t enough. You can get enough sleep at night and still spend the next day feeling worn, like you’re dragging your legs through a pool of molasses. If that is the case for you, here are some action steps you can take to help feel less burned out. Dalton-Smith fleshes the ideas out better in her book (it is a must read!) but here is a basic breakdown of a few of the 7 types of rest she discusses.
Physical
Sometimes, we simply need physical rest. Our lives get hectic. We work too much, we take our kids to too many places, and we push ourselves too hard exercising.
This goes beyond not getting enough sleep at night. The book makes an important distinction: sleep is not rest. Getting enough sleep in between grueling day after grueling day is not a solution.
So, what can you do? Cut back on activities to the extent that you can. You can also implement a weekly “do nothing day.” Pick a day of the week where the entire family can commit to not going anywhere and not engaging in strenuous physical activity.
Also, I always recommend asking for help. There is no shame in it. The pace of life can be hectic, and even the best parents and employees occasionally need to call for reinforcement. Take this time when you have help to get some self care.
Mental
This is very common in people that have been working really hard, and especially in parents. Our jobs get too overwhelming, whether that is a job outside of the home or you are a stay at home parent.
Do you find yourself having too much on your mind? Too many worries? If you are feeling overwhelmed and exhausted, you might be experiencing fatigue, and could be in need of mental rest.
If you think this is the case for you, your to-do list might need a tweak! Make it a habit to cross 2-3 things off of your list each day, and put them off for another day. We try to do too much, and there is a good chance that a couple things on your to-do list can wait until tomorrow.
You can also try meditation to help quiet your mind. Set aside 10-15 minutes at the end of the day to relax and enjoy some time calming your brain and ignoring as much outside stimuli as possible.
Spiritual
Is your heart weary in a hate-filled world? Are you looking for answers, or meaning, or validation? Many people find themselves run down when they are not getting enough spiritual rest. I certainly feel this way in today’s political climate. Things seem hopeless, filled with constant tension from all sides.
If this sounds like you, journaling might be a really good fit. Truthfully, I think it is a good fit for everyone! Take even 5 minutes each day to write down your worries, and then take sometimes to come up with a positive counter-statement.
It could also be helpful to explore a spiritual path. This does not have to be the Christian conception of God. (I’m not a Christian, and that’s not the purpose of this blog.) But there are many different paths to choose from, and you might find that one of them can bring you comfort.
Emotional
In a way, this one goes hand in hand with the one above (Spiritual rest). My heart has been incredibly heavy this past year. I’m still grieving the loss of my grandmother, and this season of parenting has been challenging. Apart from that, I live with anxiety and bipolar disorder. All of those things add up to a pretty potent emotional cocktail.
If you are like me, I definitely recommend seeing a therapist. Therapy is a game changer. These licensed professionals are trained to think outside of the box, and come up with coping strategies that you might not be able to think of yourself.
Maybe your emotional health has gotten to a point where you need professional help. Try not to worry. Yes, it might seem scary, but I promise, help is out there. And you are definitely not alone.
How to get the rest you need
Self care is essential. You might get enough sleep and still find yourself tired. Burdened by your day to day routine. So sluggish and unmotivated that you can’t manage to get out of bed.
My top three tips are:
- Cut back on your day to day responsibilities.
- Ask for help in whatever way you can.
- Read this book. It was really helpful to me. Take some time to identify what kind of rest your body needs, and then make sure you take action.
“Rest when you’re weary. Refresh and renew yourself, your body, your mind, your spirit. Then get back to work.” (Ralph Marston)
Which type of rest does it sound like you need? Let me know in the comments! And please, share this post if you found it helpful.
Try these tips for how to feel more rested, and start getting your life back.
Related posts for how to feel less tired:
How to explain depression, according to Twitter
Amazing Self Care Ideas: 10 Ways You Can Beat Stress
5 simple ways to avoid burnout
How to recognize the physical symptoms of depression and anxiety
I suffer from chronic fatigue due to my other health issues. I’ve noticed when I’m struggling mental fatigue, I run low on creativity and it’s so much harder to concentrate.
Hey there, same! When my brain is overloaded, I just can’t get anything done. Take care of yourself, and thanks for reading!
Thanks for sharing another great post, I didn’t know there is spritual rest also need to be included. I only know about physical and mental rest.
Hey Swathi, it really was an eye opening book! Glad you enjoyed the post. Thanks for reading!
I really do need to work on getting better rest. It really slows my week down.
Hey Kita, hopefully some of these tips help. Take care, and thanks for reading!
Emotional rest is so important in our life. I need it right now!
Hey Catalina, you are definitely not alone there. It’s been a very emotionally draining year for me too. Hang in there, and thanks for reading!
I think I need all these types of rest. I am exhausted with all that’s happening right now.
Hey Ruth, you are not alone! It’s been a very draining year. Take care of yourself, and thanks for reading!
I never thought about there were so many types of rest. The good thing is that there is a solution to problems with each and books on the topic.
Hey Lois, for sure. There is always information and help out there. Thanks for reading!
Rest is very important in all aspects. I make sure to have some rest and relaxation or I might end up having problems mentally, physically, emotionally, etc.
Hey Lynndee, definitely. We all need it! Thanks for reading!
Another super helpful and inspiring post! Thanks so much for sharing!!
Hey Sara, thanks so much! I appreciate it.
I need my alone time every day. I like to get up early and enjoy some peace before the noise wakes up!
Hey Heather, same! At least I try, LOL. Mine get up super early, but at least they go to bed early. Thanks for reading!
This was really useful information on proper and relevant rest. Thanks for sharing.
Hey Abby, no problem! Thanks for reading!
I have to admit I didn’t realise there was so many different types of rest. I knew there was a difference between mental and physical of course so this is really interesting to know!
Hey Sarah, it was a fascinating book! Yesterday I definitely needed a mental and emotional break. Thanks for reading!
After this year, I need all 7. I’m not even kidding.
Hey Ben, I 100% believe that. It’s been so challenging. We’ve had a lot of personal challenges in our family outside of the stuff going on in the world, so I totally get it. Take care, and thanks for reading!
Such an important topic and I love that you really teased through this concepts of rest in a practical way. Thank you!
Hey Lindsay, you’re welcome! Thanks for reading!
Loved this post! I have been feeling a bit tired lately and I think I need to add in a complete rest day. I always feel like I need to be doing something and I am going to burn out if I’m not careful!
Hey Erin, I am a recovering DOER, LOL. I still try to be productive, but I ask myself if each task is really worth it, or if it can wait. Thanks for reading!
rest is an absolute necessity.
there is nothing more important than resting and restoring your energy.
such an informative post.
thank you very much for sharing.
Hey Hari, so glad you liked it. Thanks for reading!
Interesting stuff. I had never really thought of classifying the types of rest. It makes perfect sense now you talk about it.
Hey there, it really does! I definitely need a mental break at the end of a long day with the kids. Thanks for reading!
Rest is more than sleep. It took me a while to really embrace that.
Definitely! But once I realized it, it was mind blowing. Thanks for reading.
I recently started listening to my cues to find what kind of rest I am in need from. Relaxation yoga helps with my mental and emotional fatigue. Great article!
Hey Cindy, that’s great that you are paying attention to things like that. Keep it up, and thanks for reading!
Such a good read! Rest and rejuvenation are so important but can feel so elusive as a busy mom. I’m always try to balance making time for all the different types of rest. Right now I need physical and emotional rest. It’s been hard to have any personal rejuvenation during quarantine.
It definitely has been a lot harder when you’re with little ones constantly now. Just have to somehow find the time. But it has been much harder for me too! So hang in there. Hopefully it all blows over soon 🙂
These days I don’t think many people are able to get the rest that they need. Stress is a killer but I really like this idea and these tips.
Yeah, it is definitely much harder these days. Life has gotten stressful really quickly. Hopefully it eases up soon. Thanks for reading!
This was so insightful! I can relate to each type of rest! I would say the one I need most help with is mental rest.
It’s so common! Hope you feel better soon. Thanks for reading!
I love this topic. It’s something I believe we all struggle with at least at some point of our lives. I like to listen to sleep meditation recordings on YouTube. connecting with spirit guides is always fun 🙂
I like sleep music too! I think it helps me feel more relaxed. Thanks for reading!
I love the sound of that book! Rest is so important. Right now life is so busy with work, homeschooling and keeping the house together and all the cooking and cleaning that I need a lot of mental rest…whether I get it or not is the question!
Ha, that is always the question! Hope life calms down for you soon. Thanks for reading!
My biggest need right now is mental rest. However, I probably could stand to prioritize all these areas more than what I do.
Mental rest seems to be the popular one. For me it helps to disengage by mindlessly watching tv at night lol. Sounds silly, but it helps for me to “not think” for a while. Thanks for reading!
This was a very useful post! I tend to feel worn out and tired all the time too and I might have to dive in deeper into what is causing this. Thank you for this amazing post!
Thanks! I’m glad you found it helpful. Definitely check out the book and let me know what you think!
This is a great post. Lately I’ve been a bit tired, but I know the weather has been gloomy. That usually does it for me. Between that and now homeschooling the kids and working, it has been a lot.
Definitely. We’ve had gloomy weather too and it really gets ya down. Thanks for reading!
Wow, Jen! I really loved this post, I am looking at your perspective on this and I really I need to take an emotional break for sure!
Thank you so much! Hopefully, you’re able to make some changes and feel better soon.
Love these tips! Thanks for sharing them! I think I need a lot of mental rest!
You’re very welcome! I hope you can find a way to get some rest soon 🙂
This is such a beautiful post. I actually all these types of rests not in a day but in a different day and situation. But today I am wishing for a physical rest since I’ve been working all day long.
Hopefully you get it! Thanks so much for the kind words.
OMG. Yes. I so can relate. For me personally lack of sleep and fatigue all started after the birth of my first daughter (she’s almost 13 now). My sleep has never been the same. I’ve gone to doctors etc. They’ve told me my Vitamin D is low.
Mine was too, and my iron. I agree though, that it’s never been the same since having kids. It’s so much harder to calm your mind down. Thanks for reading!
BB has had to use each of these methods, sometimes a couple at the same time! Gracias for being to forthcoming and truthful; it truly does help to know a real person is also looking for a real solution, while trying to make do with whatcha got.
Thanks! I try the best I can to share my journey, and I hope it helps people. Thank for reading as always.
Thanks for a great blog post. I’ve got so much going on at the moment and I Can definitely do with having some rest.
We all can right now, I think. It’s an unprecedented time for us. I hope life calms down for you soon! Thanks for reading!
This is a great question. After reading this, I would say I need mental rest most of all. I will challenge myself to do this asap.
Good luck! I hope you get the rest you need. Thanks for reading.
I’ve never thought of it this way, but it’s so true! I find myself needing mental rest the most often.
Same here! My kids drain my brain. Thanks for reading!
Very interesting read, I’ve got into meditation and meditation music, as mental rest is something I’ve always found really difficult.
I really want to try meditation but I’m bad at it LOL. I will give it another shot. Mental rest is my downfall too!
Hmm, I never thought of rest as having subtypes but, thinking about it, I realize that lying down or sleeping longer is sometimes not the kind of rest I need, and writing is what I need to feel at peace and reenergized. 🙂
Getting all your thoughts out could be restful! I can understand that. Thanks for reading, as always!
It’s so true, there are many different types of rest that are needed at different times. I love how you broke this down. I’ll be honest, right now I feel like I need every kind of rest possible being pregnant and having two toddlers at home with me in quarantine!
Haha wow, I bet!! Hang in there, and I hope that baby is here soon 🙂
This is really interesting I am absolutely exhausted at the moment and it doesn’t matter how much I sleep it just doesn’t get better, so I will have to look into this more!
Definitely check out the book. It was great! Hope you feel more rested soon.
Great advice! I’ve never heard of Sacred Rest! Must check it out, I’m sure I’d love it! Have a great week!
It was fantastic! I highly recommend it. If you check it out, let me know what you think. Thanks for reading 🙂
I’ve never really thought about there being multiple kinds of rest. This was very helpful! I definitely need more mental rest. I feel like I’m always on and then running fuzzy through the day and the thoughts don’t turn off at night!
Same! My kids keep me so “ON” that I need to shut off at the end of the night. Thanks for reading!
I’ve never really thought about my tiredness in any other way other than the need for sleep so this is really interesting.
I can totally relate to it though, Just reading I was able to pinpoint times where I felt physically and in particular, emotionally tired. That was my permanent state during grieving. Even now, If I have a good cry, its like taking a sleeping tablet. I am just completely worn out.
That’s how I feel after therapy, totally drained. Glad you found the info useful!
I definitely know that sleep can sometimes not be enough to recharge the batteries. Two days ago all i wanted to do was rest after a full night of sleep and today i feel great after a poor night of sleep
It’s strange how it works, isn’t it? For me, I NEED peace and quiet after a long day of being overstimulated by the kids. Thanks for reading!
I always try to get proper rest! During these crazy times it can be more difficult. Some nights are better than others.
Yeah for sure. It’s a process. Hopefully tonight is a good one!
I can definitely tell the difference between physical and mental exhaustion, I’m guilty of trying to do too much every day so perhaps I need to chill out a little so I’m not so mentally exhausted. I think this book sounds like something I’d be interested in reading.
You would love it! It was really really helpful. My main area was definitely mental.
I’d never thought about sleep not being rest before, but I can see how that would be true. I like the idea of crossing off a couple of nonessential things on the to-do list too.
I’m doing that today myself if I can lol. I want to clean the bathrooms, but they look pretty clean… Thanks for reading!
This post is really informative. I never realize that there were seven different types of rest.
This book was really mind-blowing for me and gave me a lot to think about, self care wise. Glad you enjoyed it!
This is a real eye opener – the point about how sleep is not rest has genuinely blown my mind. I find journalling is a great way to get any thoughts out if your mind is feeling super crowded especially, and I’ve started to get myself into the habit of learning to say no to stuff and that’s made a huge difference!
Thank you! I’m glad it resonated. Yes, saying No is so important. Feel free to share!
Oh this post is wonderful! I honestly never thought of rest as being anything more than physical! But when you break it down like you have you can truly find out what rest you need! My main issue is definitely needing mental rest! Thank you so much for sharing this! I can 100% say I will be returning to read again and remind myself of these!
Ashleigh – https://www.ashleighsmoments.com
Aww thanks!! One of my was definitely mental after caring for my kids as a sahm. Good luck! Thanks for reading
I love this! Rest is definitely important and sometimes it’s hard to really acknowledge that we need it.
It really is! Thanks for reading.
Such a wonderful list of reminders. Sometimes it’s hard to say “why do I still feel this way even though to slept a full night?” Great read.
Thanks! It can be hard but once you identify what kind of rest you need, it is very helpful. Feel free to share!
These are very helpful tips especially when it comes to dealing with stress, thanks for sharing.
You’re welcome! Feel free to share!
I’ve never heard of The Sacred Rest, but I think I’m going to read this book. I feel tired everyday like I never get enough rest. Part of the problem is everything I have to plus going to bed late, but my job also takes a lot of mental energy. By the end of the day, I’m exhausted. Rest is definitely something we all need more of. Thank you for sharing.
You really should! Let me know what you think. Sorry you’ve been so tired! I’ve been there.
What a great post! Rest is so important in all forms.
It really is! Thanks for reading. Feel free to share!
Awesome post. I have been putting lots of hours both for my career and working on my blog. After reading your post, I will cut back and start working smart. Its exhosting and emotinally draining. I need rest to recharge.
Thanks for the feedback! Sorry you’ve been exhausted, but I hope the book helps. Definitely check it out. Feel free to share the post!
Thanks for the reminders to rest when needed and that is not always physical rest.
you’re welcome! Thanks for reading!
I love this! I know a few people I will have to share this with!
Thanks! I appreciate you taking the time to do that
I’ve noticed as your sister noted for you that I am different without consistent rest and that due to several life changes, I’ve more easily ruffled. I think your suggestion of journaling may help with unpacking what I’m feeling and help me to put things in perspective. Very informative post about the types of rest we need to receive.
Thanks! Yes, life changes really take it out of us. Let me know how the journaling goes!
I never knew there were so many different variations of rest. I have starting to include meditation in my day. I have set aside a block of time daily for it so I do not get distracted. Great post!
thanks! sorry i didn’t reply sooner. this one when to my spam folder. Have a great day!
Oh my goodness, this post came at the right time for me. I really needed to hear this… I’ve been exhausted and haven’t really admitted it to myself. I might check out this book.
I’m sorry you’re struggling! Hopefully this post and the book can help. Hang in there!
thanks for good post useful for every one .
thank you!
You know I loved this post. Not sure if you are following any of my posts but I have one with Sacred Rest mentioned in it too! I love love love that book and am keeping it as a reference for life. Very thorough description and great job how you laid all of the 7 types out. Nicely done! So glad this info is getting out there for folks with mental health struggles especially. All the best to you!
Thank you so much! It definitely was a very eye-opening book! Same to you, and keep on keepin on.
I am putting Sacred Rest on my must-read list! I have never seen rest broken down like this. Thank you for sharing this information!
Definitely do so! It was amazing. Thanks for reading!
I’m definitely getting my hands on a copy of this book. How interesting, I had never considered the different varieties of rest before but how important it is to understand these in order to properly rest. Thank you for sharing xxx
Definitely do! It was fascinating! Thanks for reading. Feel free to share!
This is an eye-opening post. I never thought of rest being any more but physical (lying down on the couch after a long day), or sleeping. But I never feel rested, and I NEVER sleep well. First of all, I’m running out to buy “Sacred Rest.” I love the concepts you talk about here, and would absolutely like to explore them further, especially the emotional rest (I’m grieving too…I never would have anticipated how exhausting it can be). Great post!
Thank you! It has truly done wonders for me. (Crashing asleep at 6 or 630 from mental stress and overstimulation, vs now being able to stay awake til 9 or so!)
As someone who seriously suffers with fatigue I can really relate to this. There are so many ways to be tired, and sleep doesn’t help all of them. These are some really useful suggestions, really helpful!
Thanks! Give it a read and see if it helps. It has helped my chronic fatigue tremendously
Another good reminder that resting needs to be addressed on more ways than one! Thanks for the useful information.
It really does! Thanks for reading! I appreciate it
This is wonderfully laid out and very helpful. I feel a little part of me is connected to each type. Rest is so important but also one of the hardest things to do for ourselves. This year I’ve committed to not feeling like I always need to be doing something and to give myself time to rest.
Yesss! I’m so glad you said this. That was part of my 2019 issue was trying to do all the damn things. This is my year where I rest more and just sharpen my focus on the few things that matter. Thanks for reading. Feel free to share!
I love this post so much! Thank you for sharing these things. Rest is so important! I feel like often when you say rest people think of sleep but there is so much more to rest than just sleep. Sleep is only one part of feeling better, it’s also important to take care of your body mentally xx
It’s so crazy isn’t it? I was having significant chronic fatigue. Like falling asleep at 6pm nightly despite having like 10-11 hours of sleep the night before. But when I started getting more REST, and the kinds that I needed, my fatigue is much better. I’m up til like 9 now! Thanks for reading. Feel free to share.